-Alice Munro
OPEN SECRETS, Short Stories: A Real Life
Twenty-five years ago today:
Sunday, July 19, 1987
Okay…the week has gone by and I have a few things to write about. The highlight was hearing from Steffani Alexander of Hawaiii. She has called me a number of times over the last week. She excites me.
PHOTO: Steffani Alexander
Steffani is a sweetheart. The only thing is that she’s conniving and ruthless. She confessed to me about how she’s used some Korean geek’s money to live on. She is too much.
Steffani announced, “I’m going to fly over for a weekend on August 22nd this year to see you.”
“I’ll believe it when I see it.”
She laughed her cute little giggle.
I asked, “Are you working on your tan?”
“No, the locals never lie out for a tan.”
“You are so white.”
“That’s me. It’s taken me a long time to get this while while living in Hawaii.”
It was my turn to laugh.
She’s pretty and pale. She’s a bull-headed Taurus who was born on April 23rd. I like her. She’s definitely a promising connection.
I took to the gym rather well last Monday. Stewart Western appeared as did Dave Pratt. They noticed my tan. I didn’t mention I’d been in Hawaii though.
Mark Landreth called me on Tuesday night while I was at Bob Guild’s apartment. I called him back on Wednesday and we caught up on a few things. Not too much is happening. He’s working and still ‘sort of seeing’ Poison Ivy.
Mike Miller came by on Thursday night. Then we got together again on Friday night. We at at Patuzco’s where we were surprised by the excellent service. I wonder if they remembered me when I walked out with my mom after we didn’t get any initial attention. Mike and I rented a couple of movies that were very good. We watched BOYS FROM BRAZIL and BLOOD SIMPLE. He left very late. It must have been 1:30AM.
I jogged on Saturday morning. I bombed out the rest of the day. I chose to rent a couple of movies. I loved them. I watched THE COLOR PURPLE and FERRIS BUELLER’S DAY OFF. I watched them with mom and dad. By 11:20PM that night I was home to receive Steffani’s next phone call which was at 3AM. She’s crazy! I do love it when she speaks German to me though.
Steffani and I spoke of marriage, London honeymoons, sex, threesomes, masturbation, just plain ‘us’, Jeff Sombat, the Korean jerk she takes money from so freely, Rachelle, Chad, Ron Leoni, her visit on August 22nd and her constant thought of me. It’s amazing the subject matter that can come through at 3AM. She is by far my favorite current event.
I wanted to bicycle or lie in the sun for some rays this weekend but I didn’t do it. I was just plain lazy. I did wash clothes (or a made a decent start).
It is getting dark later now. I find myself restless and unsure of what I should do. I have that summer feeling.
I received a postcard from Teddy Charach, the elder film producer, that I met in Los Angeles. It seems he is in Canada until July 20th.
I haven’t heard from Don Dellamonica (the guy I met near Los Gatos). It’s NBL (No Big Loss).
Carla is back for most of the week. She has been saying she likes me lately. She’s kidding around. She just loves to flirt. It’s because I’m tan and dark now. I think she may really want to f-$%k…but I don’t know.
Nikki mentioned my getting a picture of myself to her so that she could send it to her nieces.
Nikki said, “She’s a twenty year old San Diego blond beauty!”
I smiled. It’s amazing what a Hawaiian tan will do to people.
Steffani Alexander thinks I’ve got five or six—if not more—beauties that I’m stringing along. If only her idea were true.
I said, “That’s hardly the case, my dear.”
I gave Julie Roth, my high-school connection, a phone call on Friday at her place of employment but she had left for the day. Oh well…
I am proud I have made no attempts whatsoever to reach Eileen Grabinsky. I’ve moved on.
Stacey, the so-called roommate, is still rarely here and barely ever stays the night. Since June 15th I’ve only knows of three nights that she has slept over. The rent check is still being paid though. How nice.
Mark Gebhard talked to me on Wednesday night as I was leaving the gym. He updated me on the latest.
Mark suggested, “We should watch a video at my pad one night since I live so close by.”
I was surprised by his suggestion but I said, “Okay.”
Tuesday
April 19, 1983
Today I impressed a few of my older women coworkers as I wore my black Calvin Klein jeans, black boots, one-hundred percent silk black shirt and black tie on casual day.
I overheard our main second line manager, Gail Secchia, telling her assistant managers Moe Parris and Martha Gregory, “Michael sure has a nice body.”
I thought that was a nice compliment—even though it’s clear that Gail is a lesbian.
I showed off my pictures that I had taken at the San Francisco zoo to Barbara, Pat, Joan, Juanita, Salima and Liz. They all think I’m a GREAT Photographer now. How flattering!
Juanita whispered, “I just want you to know that I’m a little jealous that you took Barbara to the zoo and not her. After all, you are my husband.”
I laughed as my phone rang and had to deal with a customer. Juanita is so much fun. She still kind of turns me on. Yum.
He shocked me when he said, “I’m going to ram my fist in your face.”
He said this in front of his fairy-like friend, Dennis Reno (who graduated from high-school with me). Of course, I didn’t appreciate Tony’s rude comment. I chose not to dwell on it. I did consider driving on my own to work though. Believe me, it’s not the first time that this has crossed my mind. Tony can be a stubborn, bull-headed son of a bitch as his astrological sign implies (Taurus) when he wants to be. I actually prefer his quiet manner. If he isn’t critical or bull-headed, snobbish or quiet he tends to be monotone and undesirable (in my opinion). I have yet to hear a compliment from him unless it is a very subtle one.
I went for a rainy April Showers bike ride via Alameda’s SOUTH SHORE beach.
I telephoned Juanita, pretending to be a man who wanted to take a survey.
She said, “Well, I’m taking a bubble bath.”
I laughed.
I also telephoned Nici Maurino while I was at home. We had a lengthy conversation about relationships, work, people we deal with at work, kids and marriage, MARINE WORLD on Saturday and the fight she had with some ex-boyfriend who gave her a black eye and fat lip. That was a revelation! She’s wild. When she removes her wire frame eyeglasses she does remind me a bit of my great high-school crush (a girl named Terri Baker).
I’m somewhat excited because I just realized that Joan Rivers is guest host for the TONIGHT SHOW tonight. That’s great!
I spoke to Juanita Lane again until almost 11PM. We talked about work, coworkers and a possible future outing together. She’s a doll. We had a relaxing conversation.
Now it’s time for my boysenberry yogurt and Joan Rivers, my favorite comedienne. My brother, John, is home showing off his new comforter, sheets and pillow cases for his new apartment. He watched a bit of the TONIGHT SHOW with me. The guests included David Steinberg, Betty White and Susan Anton (the Dudley Moore gal).
Returning to a city where you have lived before is like coming home to an old friend.
-Joanne Harris
CHOCOLAT
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