The Beginnings - Part 9: NEVER ASSUME or ART OF KISSING

When I was a child, I was always excited by the adventures of a FIRST TIME, and eager to share it with others.
-Janet Frame
An Autobiography

PHOTOS OF THE DAY: July 12, 1987
Some Photos in Alameda after my recent return from Hawaii

Twenty-five years ago today:
Sunday, July 12, 1987

Now that I take the bus each morning to San Francisco, writing in my journal on a daily basis has become much more difficult. I’ve decided to use Sunday as my writing time; whereby, a weekly entry is better than none at all.

Since last Friday…I parked my car at home after work and saw mom as she was still on vacation.

I left a message for my brother, John, at GALLAGHERS (where he works). I didn’t want him to forget to be at the house at 7AM to take me to the San Francisco Airport.

John was prompt and on time after I called him again in the morning. The flight was five hours with RADIO DAYS and CHILDREN OF A LESSER GOD as the movies in-flight. I had a non-smoking window seat with no one seated beside me. That was great. It only meant more room for me.

Stefan and Jeff were both at the Honolulu Airport to greet me. They each had a fresh floral lei for me as a typical Hawaii welcome. I loved that.

The first day I arrived I went to Waikiki Beach with Jeff. I met Ashley, Ted and some other blond girl while at the beach. I wasn’t very impressed with any of them.
Ted said, “I’m a porno star. No, I really am.”
Ashley looked like one of those ‘fuck me, you’re cute’ kind of girls. She looked used.

Jeff and I went to eat at a fast food place called the Isuzuki Café. He had to work at 10:30 at THE WAVE. I sort of fended for myself during that time.

I met Don Coggs of Los Angeles. He was a Marco Polo, pony-tailed kind-of-guy with a good sense of humor to match. Don had a sister named Tiffany. She was a real beauty. She is twenty-one and an aspiring lawyer.

Karen, the waitress at HULA’s, remembered me.
She said, “Yeah, I’m finally quitting this place on July 27th to travel to Europe.”
I thought, “Well, la dee dah, big whoopee doo!”

I ventured over to a book store to browse.  I was happy to be ‘on vacation’.

Jeff and I saw Michael J Fox in THE SECRET TO MY SUCCESS at the KUHIO Theater. It was really good. We enjoyed it. I thought I saw Jane of Burlingame. I worked with her at Pacific Bell in the SDC Department. I forgot her last name. It was definitely her. She waved my way while Jeff and I ate dinner at a Japanese Restaurant.  Jeff and I ate Korean food another night.  A lot of people know and recognize Jeff Sombat. He’s a true Honolulu local. His long hair and stylish form of dress adds to his prominence. The fact that he’s a good tipper and that he’s lived in Honolulu for most of his life is part of it, too. I hope my writing towards him doesn’t seem rude.

I also met Tony Bolger (Yes, Ray Bolger’s third cousin). Ray Bolger is best-known for playing the SCARECROW in the Wizard of Oz. Tony is a fat fellow and a write. He claimed to be a frequent jogger. I found that hard to believe with that beer belly gut.

I met Curtis, a worker at the ROYAL HAWAIIAN HOTEL for breakfast and lunch. It was brief. I doubt I’ll ever see that chap again.

I accompanied Jeff and his pal, Stephanie (who attends UCLA). We went on a tour of Hanama Bay and other beaches. We had a fun time. We all met again at THE WAVE and HULA’s. Those were the best two places in my opinion.

I did meet Leslie Abadon at SCRUPLES. She’s from Australia. We danced and danced. That was really fun. I also saw this blond body builder guy who happens to go to my gym in San Leandro. What a small world it can be. Leslie and I took a pedicab to THE WAVE. The pedicab was playing Julio Iglesias music. Leslie is a LIBRA. We shared a nice evening. We took a cab to her place. I stayed there until five o’clock in the morning. We got to the point of complete undress but there was no full intimate completion so-to-speak. We both felt guilty about the whole situation because we had both met on this first night. The attraction was there though. Leslie kept going ‘on and on’ about my kisses. She really enjoyed my kissing.
Leslie made a point of saying, “Australians just don’t KISS that way!”
I laughed. Perhaps I ought to teach an ‘Art of Kissing’ class.

I met Mary, a black girl from Germany of whom I’ll probably never see again.

Stefan was an obnoxious sort. I put up with his egotistical ways only because I had no choice. We ate dinner at SUZY WONG’s once and at MARY’s (Hamburger Mary’s) another night.

I re-met Leslie at Waikiki Beach the next afternoon. I managed to take a couple of photos. She is coming to California next week. She says she will call me. We shall see.

Jeff got the message (that I had no intimate interest for him) on the second or third night that I was in Hawaii. I got the impression that after my fifth or sixth night he couldn’t wait for me to leave back to the mainland. He tried not to show it but I know he felt that way.

I gave my business card to Steffani Alexander, the girl who had a crush on Jeff. I doubt if I’ll ever hear from her again.  I met her at THE WAVE.   She's very pretty.

I also gave my card to Daryl, the lead singer of that Canadian Band that was playing at THE WAVE. I wonder if he’ll ever contact me. I recommended that he play in some clubs in the San Francisco Bay Area. His band is quite good.

I met Joan Hurley at THE WAVE. She’s into the symphony. She’s originally from Boston. She had a conspicuous mole on her face. I loved her green kaleidoscope eyes though.

I met a fat fellow named Michael. I respected him and spoke to him in a nice way because I was fat once. Besides, I thought he was really very nice.

I love Shaved Ice. My combination pineapple cherry shaved ice reminded me of those missile popsicles. It was tremendously refreshing.

I really had a pretty good time in Hawaii.

I only sunbathed for three or four long periods and managed to capture a great tan.

Stefan and I went to get salt water to refill his aquarium. That was a different sort of adventure for me.

My rent-a-car came in handy for our ride to the North Shore of Hawaii, the Ala Moana Shopping Center and the Honolulu Airport.

I left Hawaii feeling a bit distraught about Jeff. Alas I should have been used to the episode given the same sort of situation with Johnny.

Julie Roth (from my high-school reunion) crosses my mind. I may call her when I return home.

I flew back and Chris Cordellos was the one to pick me up. I gave him a Hawaiian mug souvenir. It was just a token gesture.

I went to mom’s house briefly and then drove down to San Jose. I ran into Dan Dellamonica of Los Gatos. He’s a nice chap of only twenty-one. Of course, he’s also a student at Stanford University. His folks live in Malibu, California (give me a break!). He drives the same type of car as me. It was fun meeting him.

I spent today (July 12, 1987) at mom and dad’s house. We watched two films the EXTREMITIES (starring Farrah Fawcett) and CRIMES OF THE HEART. I took a few photos of my nieces and my sister-in-laws. I’m still tan. When will it wear off?

I got a message from Carla but her phone was not working. I may have the wrong number.

I received a letter from Eileen Grabinsky. She’s old news as far as I’m concerned. Paloma wrote, too. Her son Jonathan was born on June 4th. I must write to her again.

April 9, 1983

Barbara and I kept our ‘Zoo Date’. The San Francisco zoo wasn’t as big as I thought it might be. I saw some guy in a turquoise shirt with a little boy. It made me think of inviting two of my first-cousins who are much younger than I (Shawn and Shonette West) to the zoo one day.

I took some great animal pictures. I loved the one of the gorilla. I can’t wait to see them once they are developed.

After the zoo, Barbara and I went to eat at GOOD EATS in the El Portal area of The City. It seemed like a nice, relaxed community around there.

On the way home (with the convertible top down) I saw Linda Wanczyck (522-0076) on her bike.

I fell asleep at home while mom and dad went out for dinner at THE RUSTLER. When they returned I watched AN OFFICER AND A GENTLEMAN again. This time I watched it with mom. While watching it I was eating these Spanish peanuts that I won as a prize from the local MOBIL Service Station. Those peanuts went well with the ice-cold can of Sprite, too.

Mom and I decided to go to bed when we saw how stupid the CREATURES FEATURES movie was called THE SEVERED ARM.

I really liked the point the comedian Benny Hill made before that stupid horror flick though.
Benny said, “Never ASSUME…because then, you make an ASS out of U and ME.”
Mom liked that line too. It made us laugh.

The process of writing may be set down as simply as laying a main trunk railway line from THEN to NOW, with branch excursions into the outlying wilderness, but the real shape, the first shape, is always a circle formed only to be broken and reformed, again and again.
-Janet Frame
An Autobiography